4 Things Mums really want on Mother’s Day! (and It is not Chocolates & Flowers)
These days we have days for everything don’t we? The pressure of such days can be immense, hoping it lives up to the high expectations. Social Media has certainly added to that pressure too, as you browse friend’s photos and review their perfect Mother’s Day pictures. People never put the full picture on social media do they?! Instead it tends to look like this, right?
My husband for example does not even acknowledge Valentines day… I recall in our early relationship it used to upset me so much. Why did he not care enough? He would argue, well I do care… why do I have to show it on a day I am told… a day of flowers and chocolates is not really a measure of love, it’s all the other days and how you are treated the rest of the time that counts. Over the years I reluctantly began to see his point of view and became grateful for all the small things he does year round.
Mother’s Day is much the same. By that I don’t mean it is totally ignored like Valentines, but it never matches the hopes and dreams in my head. In fact after my first 2 mothers Days we decided to rename it in our family (between the adults only) ‘Mothers F*&$ers Day’, if you get my meaning! And don’t panic, I don’t use language like this, its just a bit of fun between husband and wife! The reason is that Mothering Sunday is cast iron guarantee in our house to be the day were everything goes wrong! My kids can sleep 364 days a year, but they will be up all night on the night before Mother’s Day, my two get on like a house on fire, except on Mothers day, my 2, listen and generally speaking are kind, thoughtful and do as they are told, except on Mothersday. I laugh about it now, and as long as I expect ‘Mother’s F*&$ers Day’ I can prepare for it and just get through it!
Mother’s Day should be about the Mother right? About letting her know you care, that you appreciate her and all she does? A day all about Mum! Well I wonder if we are honest what our dream Mother’s Day would look like? For me its not chocolate and flowers, its not even a full day with my lovely cherubs…love them to bits, but the thing us Mothers rarely get, is to just be us… in peace, doing not very much important, but just doing something, without the cry’s for help to fix the broken lego structure that the cat knocked over, or the squeal because a sibling has drawn on a perfect picture, or the visit as you just sit down on the toilet asking if you will come and look at how the kitchen floor tiles look like thaws hammer if you tilt your head this way.
So for me and I suspect many others the 3 things that would make my Mother’s day perfect are:
1.Not being woken up with half cooked breakfast in bed… let me sleep in!
2. Don’t buy me expensive gifts, get the kids to make something, this kind of stuff is treasured forever and the time and effort put into it means so much.
3. Give me some space to be me, whether it be take the kids out to the park so I can soak in the bath, or read my book. Not an all day thing just a short blast of say an hour or two, where I can totally not think of anyone or anything else.
4. And last but definitely not least, is to then spend time with the little tikes…. That sleep and time out fills a Mother with the overwhelming desire to bring her brood back to her and love them and cuddle them, because despite all the challenges of being a mum… it really does remain all about them and we would not have it any other way!
Happy Mother’s Day to all our fellow Mums, we do a great job x